okay, to be honest i have no reason to give for the silence on this space. truth is, from as long as i can remember, i always have long spells of time when i switch off from everything and everyone. when i just sit still and take stock of all the commitments i have going, all the stuff i do and all the people i surround myself with, and find a reason for each one. it usually gets most obvious with church and religion, because as anyone who reads my blog often will know, i have something about religion that i cannot put a finger on but i will not give up on either. the sorta "love God but not sure about his kids" feeling. and i know its bad, but thats what i've been doing. i have spent the whole past 2 months on a break from everything and everyone. i have cut off all the hangers on, and stopped going to church altogether (minus once or twice when i would enter during opening prayer and leave during closing prayer) because i feel really monitored and choked and constantl