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of God's many creations...damnnit

and there i was bored as heck and flipping through my twitter timeline when i stumbled on the following back and forth in retweets:

person A: "awwww, you shouldn't have said someone is ugly...its just so mean"
person B: "being mean is not a criminal offence. besides if something is a fact, its no longer considered mean"
Person A: "sha know that we are all God's creations"
person C (from the blues): "yeah, all of us except Derek J"

well, look, y'all know i'm a lawyer and as inquisitive as they come so at this point i had one of two choices. (i) jump in and retweet "whats a Derek J" (cos it better not be a human being that someone would speak about like that) or (ii) just google it. and so google it i did...and i haven't been able to snap out of it. here is Derek J.




okay look. as everyone knows, i am all for the "do whatever you like as long as it hurts nobody" but c'mon! dude, seriously? so here's my ish right here...if you're gonna be a top-heavy, formerly muscular, big necked, cross dressing whatever you are, it may help to (a) do it in the confines of your home and spare the rest of the public the nightmare of having that mental picture in their head for the rest of their lives (b) at least look good in whatever it is you're wearing - losing weight perhaps? and (c) wear a damn bra. all of which mr. j above seems not to know.

but who am i kidding. in a world of reality television and people who are famous for no reason (thereby crowding out real talent), it has become more and more difficult to get noticed if you're not doing something outright ludicrous...and so the next generation has decided that it must erode what is left of the human sense of propriety by becoming wilder, freer and encouraging others to do same. so in some sense, since i hear mr. j is a 'famous celebrity stylist' i can safely assume this is done to get him some attention. if so, then it truly does work cos if he was dressed like every other guy down the road, i doubt he would have countless blog posts about him (sadly, including this one).

i find that from experience, women find this sorts of things completely hilarious and would be the ones encouraging him to be "different" but i dare say that the american society with its boundless freedom should have boundaries of public decency. i know you're prolly thinking "of all the things on earth that we have to be rightfully worried about, why on earth would anyone spare a thought for how another person is dressed?"...to that i have no response but i kinda get how someone would rightfully assume that mr. j is definitely not God's creation. its quite clear now why the good book admonishes that men should not wear women's clothes and vice versa...totally.

see y'all around peeps.


P.S: i stumbled on this right after the post...bum shorts! LMAO ROTFL...with the stomach hanging all around and a hippo neck. i'd give him a 5 for hilarity value. 

Comments

Feyi O said…
Its quite a hilarious piece. A nice way to start a dull Friday. I will give Mr J a 4 for all his efforts@notoriety
Toinlicious said…
First time i'm hearing d name Derek J. looks like a piece of work
Ginger said…
LWKMD. The bum short picture is just killing me! My friend said he is suffering from first world problems - too much time!

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