I hate to admit that a past year was anything but exactly how it was meant to be. It kind of feels like an unforgivable act of not being grateful for all the things that could have wrong but that didn't. Eventually though, after crossing into the new year safely, i'm emboldened to be a bit more honest. However, 2014 was a year. There was no single day that did not come with its own news. It was sometimes hard to keep up.
I however find that in trying not to be labeled I altogether avoid expression of my faith. Yes, I'm almost ashamed to State categorically that I am Christian. Maybe because I am not the best example of a believer, or to preserve my usually unbiased online credibility for the moments when I have to hold a view... Whatever the case, I have shied away from making this clear. The natural implication is that as Christians are butchered around the world for their faith, I have somehow pretended that I am not any more alarmed than the next person. Alas I am.
So far, in my most private recesses though, nobody I know except my mum prays as much as I do. I literally pray about every mundane thing. My boss calls and sounds like there is trouble? I pray before going to her...a meeting I'm not certain how it will go or what I'm expected to say? I close my eyes and pray...year end assessment of my performance at work? you guessed it. On my way to court, or the airport for yet another flight, or to start preparing a presentation for my boss? Virtually everything. I also do my research to be honest but that's never enough as I've come to find.
And by pray I don't mean in my heart as I put my things together on the way out. No. I mean close my eyes type prayer. All the time. Where the circumstance permits, or in especially huge moments I run to the gents and lock myself in a steal and kneel down and really really really beg God to let me feel his presence and guidance...to guide my utterances and help me find Favour. It probably sounds cheesy but I have no complaints so far on the efficacy of prayer. I think it is what you believe in that works for you.
As the year ended and I boarded a 11 hour trans atlantic flight back home, days after a mere 3 hour fight crashed into the sea, prayer never came in more handy. I prayed as I never before did. My faith was shaken and so I went on iTunes and found Sinach "the name of Jesus". If you ever ever feel like your heart may fail you, plug this in your ears and close your eyes. It works like magic... Or prayer.
So I've decided that this year, and going forward, I will openly and honestly express my belief in God. I will share my thoughts on religion and the atrocities committed under its guise. I will however be clear that despite the short comings of the practice of my religion, it does more good than otherwise in a world that desperately needs good...and God.
Happy New Year.
I however find that in trying not to be labeled I altogether avoid expression of my faith. Yes, I'm almost ashamed to State categorically that I am Christian. Maybe because I am not the best example of a believer, or to preserve my usually unbiased online credibility for the moments when I have to hold a view... Whatever the case, I have shied away from making this clear. The natural implication is that as Christians are butchered around the world for their faith, I have somehow pretended that I am not any more alarmed than the next person. Alas I am.
So far, in my most private recesses though, nobody I know except my mum prays as much as I do. I literally pray about every mundane thing. My boss calls and sounds like there is trouble? I pray before going to her...a meeting I'm not certain how it will go or what I'm expected to say? I close my eyes and pray...year end assessment of my performance at work? you guessed it. On my way to court, or the airport for yet another flight, or to start preparing a presentation for my boss? Virtually everything. I also do my research to be honest but that's never enough as I've come to find.
And by pray I don't mean in my heart as I put my things together on the way out. No. I mean close my eyes type prayer. All the time. Where the circumstance permits, or in especially huge moments I run to the gents and lock myself in a steal and kneel down and really really really beg God to let me feel his presence and guidance...to guide my utterances and help me find Favour. It probably sounds cheesy but I have no complaints so far on the efficacy of prayer. I think it is what you believe in that works for you.
As the year ended and I boarded a 11 hour trans atlantic flight back home, days after a mere 3 hour fight crashed into the sea, prayer never came in more handy. I prayed as I never before did. My faith was shaken and so I went on iTunes and found Sinach "the name of Jesus". If you ever ever feel like your heart may fail you, plug this in your ears and close your eyes. It works like magic... Or prayer.
So I've decided that this year, and going forward, I will openly and honestly express my belief in God. I will share my thoughts on religion and the atrocities committed under its guise. I will however be clear that despite the short comings of the practice of my religion, it does more good than otherwise in a world that desperately needs good...and God.
Happy New Year.
Comments
Go-on-your-knees type prayer really? I'm, pleasantly surprised. I should probably try that.
So erm, does this mean more blogging this year?