stiffling concern...

you know, there was a time when you could virtually be dying and noone would know, or care? well, those days are gone. and i'm not even sure their being gone is altogether a good thing. seriously. i watch the news all the time and often wonder how white folk live literally neighboured by serial killers, murderers and kidnappers for tons of years and never figure it out! i mean, you should try black folk, or better still black folk women. you cannot keep a darn secret!

it always starts with the traditional doey-eyed: "are you okay?" even when you look perfectly fine and no different from the last time they saw you. any response other than "i'm fine" immediately translates to an interrogation. "whats the matter?" always comes next also with the over-concerned look. if that doesn't work to get you to spill, then comes the "you look funny" phrase to justify their insistence on hearing your life history...and of course in trying to defend your looks, you're bound to slip up. expectedly, as soon as you give details of what ails you, you will be assailed with unsolicited recommendation ranging from guzzling palm oil to swimming in shea butter and everything in between. naturally, while you nod in agreement and take notes, you know somewhere in your mind that the only time you will use their remedies will be never. and then true to form, as soon as you turn around, they'll be telling the next colleague that you're ill to the point of death and how they just saved your life. smh

okay so on thursday i took ill...you know, of a personal nature. er...that didn't sound right. no it wasn't an STD you duffus, i was having the runs. and it was making me run to the gents every ten minutes, and frankly speaking, that wasn't an issue at all and i was happy to note that i could manage myself till i closed for the day. well, how wrong i was. the first female colleague going by my desk, says "are you okay?" (typical starting point)...i say i'm fine. after 20 minutes, next female person goes: "i've seen you get up quite a few times in a hurry, is everything okay?" with full concern on her face (like you're not asking that to fuel the rumour mill), "yes it is ma'am!"...next thing i know, another female colleague decides she might as well hit the nail on my unwilling head: "are you having diarrhea?" darn miss.i-gotta-know, some privacy please??? sheesh! eventually, i had to ask for permission to go to the hospital and of course i had to give graphic details of my issues which i knew would be all over the office before i stepped out the door. if the ground could just open up...

to cut the long story short, i am given a day off to rest yesterday and i'm thinking blissful thoughts on my bed, thankful to be free from prying eyes and...from nowhere i hear a knock on my door. i'm thinking: wait up, this is a weekday and i'm not expecting anyone so whence cometh the knock. it was just my neighbour's wife who just happens to be passing by (looking for whom to use as headline news) "wondering why your car was still here. is everything okay?" gaddamnit you nosy woman, do i need a parking permit to leave my car in my own compound on a work day?!!! i almost screamed. true to the african tradition of 'love thy neighbour then gossip about them', almost all of my neighbours dropped by at one time or the other just wondering if everything was okay, without saying how they got to suspect that i was home all day. please tell me how i can be a murderer in the circumstance.

anyways i'm back to work now in full swing and ready to go. thank you all for nominating my blog for the nigerian blog awards, and before you ask "are you okay?", yes i am for the umpteempth time. damnit