okay, so when i wrote my blog yesterday, i told y'all that i do absolutely nothing during my leave period and i wasn't lying. but then lying on my bed late at night, i began to think about all the things that had happened to me in the past week or so just to get a sense of what i can use my free time to accomplish.
and then my mind went to sunday during church service. the upper saturday, we had a church youth programme about financial empowerment and afterwards, encouraged all the participants to network and exchange numbers. so last sunday after service, as vice president of the youth fellowship (yep, thats me), i was standing behind the church looking like a proud father when sister wunmi came to me and said she had some things to sell, that she is certain i would be interested in. naturally, i was surprised at the certainty because frankly, i havent ever said more than a cursory hello to her since i joined the church in february. next thing she goes and bring pants and singlet...yes, right there in the full glare of young dynamic (maybe even interested in me) christian ladies, sister wunmi and i were holding underwear in church. and i don't meant pants like the americans, i mean "briefs", or "pata", or "payint" if you're so inclined.
two things came to my mind, (a) what made sister wunmi think i didnt have enough pant and singlet - i admit i wasn't wearing singlet that particular day - and (b) why me of all the brothers in the church? the answers that came to my mind for both questions were not nice ones so i just smiled politely and told her that i usually only wear calvin klein underwear (in the hope that she would leave me alone). lo and behold, she just turned around, left me standing with the wares, and returned with even more pant and singlets with calvin klein written on it (darn, i should have said "tony montana" or some non-existing designer). by this time, two other brothers in church had come to indicate interest in this transaction. if i could blush, i would. and so, to cut the nightmare short, i just picked the nearest one to me and said i would take that. as i was walking away, sister wunmi shouted, "NO! Brother Orok, you cannot take that one, it is not your size." maybe it was just in my head, but somehow, everyone just seemed to fall quiet. i just turned back quietly to return it to her when she said: "Don't worry, i'll order your size specially cos you are too fat". WOW. talk about excellent marketing skills sister wunmi! calling you customers not just fat, but "too fat". way to go.
so before 7 am this morning, i was on a treadmill at my gym sweating like i was battling a purging stomach during a bad court case. damn you sister wunmi, i'll show you fat. the bad thing about my gym is that the people i see there are not encouraging. nobody seems to be losing any weight (except me of course, i lost quite a few pound this morning) and the women just seem to be growing muscular arms...i pity the husbands. the guys...well, lets just say they're not working on their stomachs so it makes everyone look stumpy and short but i guess thats the look they're aiming for, right?
believe it or not, i did two straight hours of cycling, treadmill and stairclimber and i feel so much better. it was so gruelling that immediately i was done i had two lucozade sports drinks, two bottles of ice cold water, one chickenpie and one meatpie on the way home. i feel like denzel washington already!
see y'all tomorrow peeps. and don't be shocked when you see how fit/slim i have become (although i know y'all won't admit it re: envy).
later
and then my mind went to sunday during church service. the upper saturday, we had a church youth programme about financial empowerment and afterwards, encouraged all the participants to network and exchange numbers. so last sunday after service, as vice president of the youth fellowship (yep, thats me), i was standing behind the church looking like a proud father when sister wunmi came to me and said she had some things to sell, that she is certain i would be interested in. naturally, i was surprised at the certainty because frankly, i havent ever said more than a cursory hello to her since i joined the church in february. next thing she goes and bring pants and singlet...yes, right there in the full glare of young dynamic (maybe even interested in me) christian ladies, sister wunmi and i were holding underwear in church. and i don't meant pants like the americans, i mean "briefs", or "pata", or "payint" if you're so inclined.
two things came to my mind, (a) what made sister wunmi think i didnt have enough pant and singlet - i admit i wasn't wearing singlet that particular day - and (b) why me of all the brothers in the church? the answers that came to my mind for both questions were not nice ones so i just smiled politely and told her that i usually only wear calvin klein underwear (in the hope that she would leave me alone). lo and behold, she just turned around, left me standing with the wares, and returned with even more pant and singlets with calvin klein written on it (darn, i should have said "tony montana" or some non-existing designer). by this time, two other brothers in church had come to indicate interest in this transaction. if i could blush, i would. and so, to cut the nightmare short, i just picked the nearest one to me and said i would take that. as i was walking away, sister wunmi shouted, "NO! Brother Orok, you cannot take that one, it is not your size." maybe it was just in my head, but somehow, everyone just seemed to fall quiet. i just turned back quietly to return it to her when she said: "Don't worry, i'll order your size specially cos you are too fat". WOW. talk about excellent marketing skills sister wunmi! calling you customers not just fat, but "too fat". way to go.
so before 7 am this morning, i was on a treadmill at my gym sweating like i was battling a purging stomach during a bad court case. damn you sister wunmi, i'll show you fat. the bad thing about my gym is that the people i see there are not encouraging. nobody seems to be losing any weight (except me of course, i lost quite a few pound this morning) and the women just seem to be growing muscular arms...i pity the husbands. the guys...well, lets just say they're not working on their stomachs so it makes everyone look stumpy and short but i guess thats the look they're aiming for, right?
believe it or not, i did two straight hours of cycling, treadmill and stairclimber and i feel so much better. it was so gruelling that immediately i was done i had two lucozade sports drinks, two bottles of ice cold water, one chickenpie and one meatpie on the way home. i feel like denzel washington already!
see y'all tomorrow peeps. and don't be shocked when you see how fit/slim i have become (although i know y'all won't admit it re: envy).
later
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